Photograph
by 0mrsprongs0
Summary: Remus is sick of his life. He decides to do something about it. Songfic to Photograph by Nickelback. HBP Spoliers. RS Slash. WARNING: CHARACTER DEATH.


Summary: Remus is at Hogwarts and cant forget about Sirius or his time with the Marauders. He decides to do something about it. HBP spoilers. Remus/Sirius slash.Songfic to Photograph by Nickelback. Warning: CHARACTER DEATH.

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or Nickelback. Der.

AN: Ok, so I cant stand angst, and I dont normally stray from the MWPP era, but I felt that today called for it. I've never done angst, and this is very un-beta'ed so if you spot anything wrong, feel free to point it out! I had to change the words to the song quitea bit too, so sorry to any Nickelback fans.And, as I said before, I've never done angst, so tell me how I went! Also, this is SLASH so dont say I didnt warn you. HBP Spoilers, too. Also there IS A CHARACTER DEATH. Meaning SOMEONE DIES, so please, please, PLEASE dont say that I didnt warn you about it!

RS RS RS RS RS RS RS RS RS RS RS RS

Remus walked slowly from the Great Hall after dinner. How did his lifeget so bad? He made his way to the room that he had been staying in for a while now. Ever since Dumbledore died, the Order had been staying at Hogwarts.

Remus sighed and sat at his desk, resting his head in his hands. Without moving his head, he opened a draw and pulled out an old photo. The photo thatused to fill him with joy and thoughts of a time when he was happy, but now it only made him sad.

**Look at this photograph,  
every time I do it makes me laugh.  
How did our eyes get so red,  
and what the hell is on Peter's head.**

Remus smiled at the memory. It was his graduation from Hogwarts. The Marauders were laughing and joking, not knowing what was in store for them. Was Peter already planning to hand one of his best friends over to Voldemort? Remus's smile quickly turned into a scowl as he looked at Peter. Where had they gone wrong with him? Peter loved James, he looked up to him.Why would he do that to him? Remus sighed as he switched his gaze to James. He had to fight the tears that were screaming to makethemselves known. What would he give to hear James laugh again? To see him grinning like a fool when he looked at Lily.

Remus slammed the photo backonto his desk, lifting his head to stare at the roof, willing the tears to go away. After a few minutes, Remus picked up the photo again. He shifted his eyes to himself and Sirius. Remus was laughing and trying to pry Sirius's arms off of his waist,while still trying to smile at the camera. Sirius was staring lovingly at Remus, refusing to move his arms. Placing kisses on Remus's neck at every oppurtunity.Remus did nothing to try and stop the tears this time. Why did Sirius leave him? After so many whispered promises and loving kisses, Sirius was gone. Remus wiped his cheeks and exhaled, forcing himself to calm down. The moment before the Order had gotten word that Harry had gone to the Department of Mysteries, Sirius had promised Remus he would stay with him forever. Two hours later, he had broken that promise.

Remus would have done anything to have his Sirius back. Back in his arms, telling him that he loved him and that hewould do anything for him. Remus's head was suddenly filled with the sounds of Sirius. Sirius laughing, Sirius whispering promises of love, Sirius crying, Sirius moaning his name. Remus had to get out of this room. He ran as fast as he could, trying to get away from the memories Sirius. He found himself staring up at Hogwarts, the photo crumpled in his hand.

And this is where I went to school,  
most of the time had better things to do.  
Detention record says I broke out twice,  
I must have done it half a million times.

Remus remembered all the times the four Marauders had snuck into Hogsmeade, and the one time they managed to stay at that cave in the mountains for an entire summer without their parents _or _Hogwarts finding out. Remus had spent most of that summer wrapped in Sirius's arms. He wanted to go back, back to the time when his biggest problems were gettinghis trouble-making friends out of detention, or the potions test coming up. He watched the crescent moon rise over Hogwarts. 

Every memory of looking' out the dorm door,  
I had the photo album spread out on my bedroom floor,  
It's hard to say it, time to say it,  
Good-bye good-bye.

Remus made a decision right at that moment. He wasn't going to put up with not having his friends anymore. He wasn't going to be forced to pretend that he was happy with the way his life had turned out. He wasn't going to put up with being groped by his Sirius's fluoro-haired cousin at every opportunity she had. Remus was going to say good-bye to the lot of them. He looked at the photoclutched in his hand. "Forgive me, Sirius."

**  
Every memory of walking' out the front door,  
I found the photo of the friend that I was looking for,  
It's hard to say it, time to say it,  
Good-bye good-bye.**

Remus got back to his room and had no intention of going to bed. He had made a decision and wasn't going to back down. He didn't care if his choice was going to cause some problems for the Order, all he cared about was the fact that his life was terrible, and this was the only way to ease his pain. He opened his trunk started rummaging around. By the time he had found what he was looking for, he had gone through every photo that he owned. Many of them had been of himself and Sirius in compromising positions. He had whispered "I'm sorry, Sirius" to every single one of them. He finally found the small bottle of dark purple potion he was looking for.**  
**

**We used to listen to the radio,  
and sing along to every song we'd know.  
We said someday we'd find out how it feels,  
to sing to more than just the steering wheel.**

Sirius had wanted to be a rock-star when he was in school. He was always singing to Remus and humming tunes. He was going to be famous, and Remus would have been loved by the best rock-star to ever hit the wizarding world. As Remus slowly replaced everything that wasn't a bottle of dark purple potion in his trunk, he was certain that he was going to do this. He would finally be rid of everything that his life had come to be, everything that he hated, and he was going to finally be back with Sirius. The person he loved more than anything. Sirius Black.

**  
He was the first guy I kissed,  
I was so nervous that I nearly missed.  
He's been to prison, and died since then,  
And I've loved him since God knows when. **

Remus looked at the photo from his Graduation. His photo-self had given up trying to remove Sirius's arms, and was currently snogging him senseless. Remus watched in envy. He wanted to be back there. Kissing Sirius, and laughing with his friends. He knew he was never going to get back there, he was going to do the next best thing. He was going to leave the pain of this war behind him. He was going to leave this life behind him.

Every memory of looking' out the back door,  
I had the photo album spread out on my bedroom floor,  
It's hard to say it, time to say it,  
Good-bye good-bye.

Slowly Remus walked to the lake. It was well past midnight, they wouldn't find him until the morning, and they would be hours to late. Remus had the photo with him, he watched himself in it for hours. Watched himself kiss Sirius, and laugh with James and Peter. Finally, he decided it was time. Before he had to face another day full of worry and anxiety. He took one last look at the photo, and felt tears sliding down his cheeks. He slowly pulled the cap off the potion with a small puff of light purple mist billowing out. While he was still looking at the photo, at Sirius, the photo thatused to fill him with joy and thoughts of a time when he was happy, but now it only made him sad. In one gulp, he swallowed he potion and threw the bottle away.

It only took seconds to work. Remus could feel his throat constricting, and his vision was becoming cloudy. He closed his hand around the photo and placed his head on the grass. It was over.

**It's hard to say it, time to say it,  
Good-bye good-bye.**

Remus found himself surrounded by light. He didn't know where he was.

"Remus?" He turned around and what he saw made him happier than he had ever been.

"Sirius!"

**Look at this photograph,  
every time I do it makes me laugh.  
Every time I do it makes me...**

SR SR SR SR SR SR SR SR SR SR SR SR SR

Ok, so when I started writing this, I wasnt planning to kill Remus. But then I realised that the only way for him to be happy, was if he was with Sirius, so then I thought "Well, how do I get him with Sirius?" So yes. Well, dont kill me! I'm sorry for killing him! But he's with Sirius, so it's all good! And, as I mentionedat the start, this is very un-beta'ed. Also, I wrote it in about an hour, so if it'scomplete rubbish, I blame myself. And the site keeps deleting spaces between words, so any missing spaces isn't my fault. Cookies to reviewers! D


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